One of the most amazing developments over the last 10 years in job searching is the increasing role of parents in the process. What is unfortunate about this is that many parents have not made good decisions regarding what should be their role.
Why this recent phenomena? There are many theories, but among them are the following:
• Increasing range of what is considered youth – In the not so distant past, an eighteen year-old would never be considered a child, however, that is eroding with adolescence lasting now, for many, well into their twenties. The thought is that these “children” are incapable of handling the complexity of a job search.
• High cost of college tuition – Parents have invested so much into the education of the children that they want to manage the job search process so that their child is employed as quickly as possible at their highest rate. With high student loans and other bills there is little room for error for the recent graduate.
• High relocation out of WNY – There is often a desire to bring a child back into WNY, which will compel a parent to get involved. On the flip side, a parent will actively search so that the son or daughter does not leave the area.
A parent (or Grandparent) involved in the job search of a child can work if done correctly. Remember, the goal is not just to have your child land a job, but land one that they will be successful at. This is, of course, for non-minor children. Any minor should have their parent involved in some degree in the process.
Let’s start with what not to do:
• Write the Cover Letter and Resume – A Job Seeker needs to be intimately knowledgeable of their documents. It will become readily apparent to a recruiter that your child did not write their documents.
• Attend the Interview – Do not ever enter with your child for the interview. If you must come along, then drop your child off and wait in the car or preferably somewhere else. If this off-site spot exists, arrange it ahead of time. A candidate looks silly if they are waiting outside for their parents to pick them up. By the way, this also includes a Career Fair. The best rule of thumb is to never let the company see you with your child.
• Call for Follow-Ups – No recruiter wants to hear from a parent inquiring about when their child is going to be interviewed, how they did, or why they did not get hired. Trust me; they will talk about you when the interview is over. They may even talk about your child to all their friends and you may find a dozen of companies that won’t hire your son or daughter. Besides, on the long-shot chance that you will pressure a Hiring Manager into hiring your child, what are the odds that they will be successful?
• Think Twice About Setting Them Up In Your Company – Unless it is a family business, I would avoid having your child work in the same company as you. Among the many reasons are: if something would happen to the company you would both be struggling, you may hamper their career due to their child status, or you may hamper your own career if there is a sense of favoritism from other workers. Don’t forget, you can’t guarantee success. If your child does not work out, you may feel very embarrassed.
What you can do:
• Critique the Cover Letter and Resume – Other people reviewing a document always helps. Make sure that everything necessary is included in the documents. Do not let misspellings and grammatical errors slip through.
• Support the Interview – That may mean letting your child use your car so they can drive themselves. A parent can be a great mock interviewer. You can interview your child and allow them to practice their answers.
• Share Your Wisdom – You have done the process before. Share with your child what the professional expectations are along with the common processes.
• Be an Extra Set of Eyes/Ears – Networking is very important. Share your relevant contacts to build their rolodex for networking. Nothing wrong with logging onto an employment website like wnyjobs.com every once in a while to see if there is anything that may interest your child.
• Support Your Child – It is tough to see your child unsuccessful at something, but the reality is that a job search will probably involve considerable rejection. Be there with an encouraging word, a hug, or some of the wisdom mentioned above
As a parent it is very tempting to be actively involved in every decision of your child so that you can guarantee success. The reality is that there are many aspects of the Job Search that a person has to experience for themselves. Be consultative and be supportive, but ultimately your child needs to conduct their own job search.
As always, best of luck in your job search.
The following has been prepared for the general information of RochesterJobs readers. It is not meant to provide advice with respect to any specific legal or policy matter and should not be acted upon without verification by the reader.
Joe Stein
WNY Human Resources Professional
Feel free to contact Joe Stein regarding questions or comments at:
Joe Stein
